So. Yeah. About that.

WIP update: I’m roughly 4600 words in. Chapters 1 and 2 are written. Chapter 3 is in progress. I kind of feel like all of it is crap, but my lovely first draft readers assure me that’s not true. Of course, I don’t entirely believe them, but I’m trying to remember that crap is okay for right now. I just gotta get the story down, then I can mold it into something pretty.

I do feel pressure to be polished, though. Even on this blog. It’s very difficult for me to shut off my Internal Editor, even though I know it’s holding me back. In fact, that might be my greatest challenge as a writer. That and my ASDD: Avidly Seeking Distractions Disease.

(Dude, it’s totally a real thing.)

Also, I completely forgot to do my morning pages this weekend. Whoops. I’ll blame my dog. See, there’s a new (ADORABLE!) puppy next door, and Riley has taken it upon himself to announce the puppy’s comings and goings with a rousing chorus of barks and howls. No matter what time of day. Or night. Yeah, it’s awesome. NOT. It also means I didn’t sleep great on Friday night, which means I didn’t function that well on Saturday. There’s still time for me to do my “morning” pages today, though.

In better news, I might be published soon? I submitted my flash fiction piece “How to Field Dress a Deer” to my alma mater’s literary magazine, and I got an email today that it was accepted. Hurrah! More details on that if/when it’s confirmed.

And finally, at the risk of sounding hokey, lately I’ve been reminded that real life/the world around us really does provide the best stories and inspiration. Like Joannie Rochette’s tragedy & triumph at the Olympics. Or like this weird parasitic fungus that infects an ant, kills it, and then bursts out of its head. Or like a twenty-something writer who’s struggling to meet her daily word quotas and just wants to watch some cute rom-coms, goshdarnit!

Oh, that one’s not a good story? My bad.


17 responses to “So. Yeah. About that.”

  1. Sonja Avatar

    Congrats on getting your piece accepted! And on slogging through your story. I’ve never been much of a re-writer, either, but I’ve heard that it’s a good thing. I’ve also come to times when I’ve been writing where I felt like I was struggling, trying to get to the next scene that I actually *wanted* to write, and thinking that what I was writing in the meantime was crap, and then later reading the whole piece through and feeling like what I’d thought was crap turned out just fine. So good for you for going through it, and when you re-read it weeks or months from now, it might not be as bad as you think it is now. :)
    .-= • Recent post by Sonja: In which I make six spring rolls =-.

  2. Lauren Avatar

    Oh my god, I think I suffer from ASDD! lol.

    Inner Editor hmm? I think it’s my inner editor that prevents me from writing blog posts such as yours. One’s with a personal voice. The ones I write tend to gain a stiff quality from my constant checking for grammar mistakes. Example: That’s not a complete sentence! Add a clause.

  3. Rebecca @ Diary of a Virgin Novelist Avatar

    Congrats on the publication. So exciting!

    And I totally relate to those first draft insecurities. I am dying to rewrite and polish my WIP but I know I’ve got to get it all down first.
    .-= • Recent post by Rebecca @ Diary of a Virgin Novelist: Paying it forward, backwards and sideways =-.

  4. Kristan Avatar

    Sonja-
    Thanks! And you’re probably right, it won’t seem as bad later. I hope… :P

    (Fyi, your story idea was the first thing that reminded me how inspiring real life/the world around us is, but I didn’t want to take the liberty of broadcasting your idea.)

    Lauren-
    I think opening up online is a difficult thing to do. For me, anyway. And there’s definitely a limit to how far I will go. But I try to remind myself that if I’m not at least a little bit personal, then what’s the point of blogging like this anyway? After all, it’s a blog about my journey as a writer, ya know?

    Rebecca-
    Thanks! Why don’t we both resolve not to rewrite until we’re done?

  5. Sarah Avatar

    Kristan! So exciting that your story was accepted, especially from Carnegie Mellon. I’m from the ‘Burgh so I know what they’re like ;) so brilliant!
    Okay, so this discussion about polished writing…I feel this pressure too because when I go back to reread for a starting point in my next writing session, I see all the mistakes from the previous part. For my sanity, I need to edit that a little bit and then move on, then go back and change things that will be consistent with the story. I think this is because I haven’t outlined. Now you, I think you should listen to your gut and plow forward until you’re done. Next book, I’ll do the same.
    As far as your blog being personal, I really like it that way. There are some blogs with lots of tips and info and some that are inspiring to read–you have a bit of both, which is nice.
    .-= • Recent post by Sarah: Listen, to Sarah’s Sunday Sermon =-.

  6. Samantha Bennett Avatar

    I agree. ASDD is a very real illness–especially among writers. We should get a support group or something. :)
    .-= • Recent post by Samantha Bennett: Lobstermen and Inquisitive Minds =-.

  7. Kristan Avatar

    Sarah-
    Sometimes I do that too (edit a wee bit while I’m rereading the previous day’s work) which I think is fine, outline or not. It’s the full-on I-want-to-REWRITE feeling that I’m trying to resist…

    And thanks, about the blog comments. I like the mix too, although it’s hard to find the right balance. :)

    Samantha-
    Fo shizzle. I don’t think the world understands the seriousness of ASDD yet!

  8. Jon Avatar

    I agree, ASDD exists. The only way to defeat it I think would be to cancel my internet. Otherwise, there are a million ways I can procrastinate online.
    .-= • Recent post by Jon: Oscar Nominated Animated Shorts: You Be the Judge =-.

  9. Kristan Avatar

    Whoa whoa whoa! Turning internet off is one thing. But CANCELING it? WHO ARE YOU?

  10. Les Avatar

    I would die without the internet. Not even close to kidding in any way.

    Definitely a procrastinator, and my mind is wholly in the dumps today so I’m finding myself not doing a damn thing.
    .-= • Recent post by Les: A nerdy tantrum =-.

  11. Sierra Godfrey Avatar

    WOW WOW WOW thanks for that awesome post to the ant article! Man that was the best ever! I mean, things could really be sooooo much worse, you could totally have brain eating fungi! Fascinating stuff.
    .-= • Recent post by Sierra Godfrey: Author Web Sites =-.

  12. Aisha Avatar

    Yeah that article was hardcore. Like some of the commenters on that site, I also learned about the Cordyceps fungi on Planet Earth, it was so fascinating. When an ant was infected it would start acting crazy and another ant would have to carry it far away from the clan where the alien parasite would slowly burst out of its head and the infected ant would die alone.

    Have you ever seen any of the Planet Earth documentaries? They’re all really really good.

  13. Kristan Avatar

    Sierra-
    Glad you enjoyed it! Crazy, no?

    Aisha-
    Actually that’s where I saw it, haha. Andy loves Planet Earth, so I’ve seen a lot of it and probably don’t even realize.

  14. Aisha Avatar

    Andy gains my approval, yet again ;)

  15. Liz Czukas Avatar

    Congrats on the accepted submission! I can only assume that it’s not actually a field guide to dressing a deer, but maybe you have all kinds of survival skills I know nothing about. Could be, right?

    You’re getting words on “paper” everyday and that counts. Keep on keepin’ on. And then watch some rom-coms.

    – Liz
    .-= • Recent post by Liz Czukas: Teaser Tuesday – March 2, 2010 =-.

  16. Kristan Avatar

    Aisha-
    Lol! I’ll be sure to tell him.

    Liz-
    Thanks! Actually… it DOES teach you how to field dress a deer, if you really want to know. But it’s not *about* that. (It was an assigned topic; I have no real survival skills. Except Andy. He was an Eagle Scout.)

  17. Meghan Ward Avatar

    That’s totally disgusting about the ant fungus. Gross. And congrats on the lit mag!
    .-= • Recent post by Meghan Ward: iPad prophecy and why I’m not blogging =-.