Today I’m over at The Solitary Panda, guest blogging for the lovely and brave Floreta while she’s in India. The theme is identity. Can you guess what I consider mine to be?

Here’s  a little preview:

The chameleon

As a young child, I had a handful of close family friends, none of whom knew each other, all of whom knew a certain version of me. Then there were my school friends. Then there were my Chinese school friends. Because I wanted to be liked by them all, I learned to act a certain way for each of them, and I started to think of myself as a chameleon, constantly changing colors.

Wanna learn about the halfie and the word nerd parts? Head on over to Floreta’s for the rest. And please show her some love? Thanks!

Update: I also posted a new JBU column I wrote about all my crazy travel at the end of last year!

Things that are happening:

1. LOVING Erin Danehy’s young adult steampunk-ish fantasy manuscript. I don’t want to jinx it with any crazy predictions, but it’s good, y’all. Really good. Definitely shelf-worthy, if you catch my drift.
2. Querying, and thus rejection. Yes, I got my first rejection from an agent today. I was disappointed because she seems like a great agent, but I didn’t take it personally or anything. I just turned around and sent 3 more queries out. That makes a total of 10, which I think is a good “resting place” for now.
3. Drinking Airborne. Yesterday my lymph nodes started to feel swollen and uncomfortable, so I think I might be battling a cold or something. No fun.
4. Itching to write! (Note: This is a totally different kind of disease, which I never try to fight.) Last night I took the prologue and first chapter of my young adult supernatural manuscript to my writing group, and they were extremely complimentary and encouraging. It’s such a great feeling, that high you get when you realize that something you’ve written has really pleased people. But! I already put that book aside to work on a different book. And then I put that book aside to work on this new one. And this new one is still in the planning stages! So: I want to write, but it’s not time yet. Boo. Hopefully this weekend I can scratch the itch…

Things that are not happening:

1. Planning the new book. I mean, it was happening, but I hit a snag. Last night as I was falling asleep, I thought of a huge problem with my new world, and I have yet to solve it. Grr.
2. Thinking of good blog ideas. Obviously. I keep wanting to talk about the progress I’m making on my new book, but oh yeah, see #1 above. Sigh. Instead I may post the last of the short pieces that I wrote at the Kenyon Review Writers Workshop, since I haven’t managed to place it into any magazines for publication.
3. Your face.

Writing and love are both leaps into the unknown, acts of discipline as much as they are acts of faith. If you are not in love with writing then you shouldn’t write, because without love, you won’t be able to take it. (And I didn’t say in love with your writing—I said in love with writing. There’s a difference.)

Maybe this is how we continue to face the anguish of rejection: through the inherent belief that we are good and worthy and that our efforts and our being are not doomed to solitude; that we will find validation and laugh in the faces of those who once rejected us, even if we know that that kind of victory is temporal at best; even as we redefine rejection not so much as defeat, but as an inevitable part of our process, our climb toward victory, which is at least partially won as long as we choose to write.

- from “Rejection” by Terrence Cheng, via Glimmer Train