A couple weeks ago when I posted the new cover image for my Facebook page, several of you asked about Andy’s book, saying you had no idea he was a writer. Well, that’s because he isn’t one, according to him.

“Yeah, I wrote a book, but I’m not a writer.”

Paradox? Allow me to explain.

“Yeah, I wrote a book…”

I met Andy as a freshman in college. He was a sophomore, and the Resident Assistant for my floor. (Don’t worry, we didn’t date until a couple years later.) Andy was a great RA — in fact, he inspired me to become one myself. And lucky me, I got to take over the exact same floor that I had lived on and that he had been in charge of. A floor called NEW HOUSE 5.

Yes, that’s the name of his book, and it’s about my freshman year floor.

Now, this is where it gets messy. Because the “characters” in the story are based on real people. (Yes, I’m in it.) But that doesn’t mean that everything in the book is true. (Having lived through it myself, I can assure you it’s not.) Problem is, the lines between fiction and reality can be blurry, and there was enough truth to upset people. Andy lost some things as a result.

First, he lost friendships. There are a couple people who haven’t spoken to him since the book came out, and several more whose opinions of him and relationships with him were changed forever. I think that was the hardest part for Andy. He’d wanted to do something special — to honor the great experiences that he’d had as our RA, and to paint an accurate picture of college life for other students, RAs, and parents to enjoy — but not everyone appreciated how he went about it, or the secrets he divulged.

Second, he lost his job. Andy was supposed to be the Community Advisor for New House (an RA for the RAs — i.e., my boss) but when the book came out, Student Life panicked and fired him. They had gotten some complaints, I think, and were probably worried about confidentiality, lawsuits, and the like.

(This, of course, AFTER the school had put out multiple press releases celebrating his accomplishment.)

The tizzy didn’t end there. Most students were oblivious to the book, and remain so to this day, but that didn’t appease the administrators. Supposedly all the deans were required to read the book and vote on whether or not to expel Andy from the university. Outside of that debate, NEW HOUSE 5 became taboo. One secretary even confessed to Andy that she loved his book, but she’d had to read it in secret, hiding it inside a different cover so she wouldn’t get in trouble.

Now, all of this happened within the span of a few days, and the Dean of Student Affairs was traveling during that time. As soon as she returned and learned of his firing, she apologized to Andy and reinstated him as CA at a different dorm. I suspect that she realized what the years have proven to be true: that the book would not ruin anyone’s life, and that almost no one would recognize the characters in the book unless they already knew the real people.

(Furthermore, Andy had discussed the book with the floor ahead of time and had support to publish it. He also took some steps to protect people by changing names, mixing identifying traits/actions, and creating new characters. I think any legal battle would have been murky, although I’m glad it didn’t come to that.)

Hard to believe that was 7 years ago. Whatever splash the book made has long died down, but occasionally we still feel a ripple or two. Like at our friends’ wedding this past weekend, when the best man referenced the book in his speech. Can you say awkward?

(Funny, but awkward.)

The book’s contract expired in January, and rather than renew with the publisher (who was offering less attractive terms than before) Andy decided to make use of the new tools that have cropped up. With my help and Stephanie’s awesome design skills, NEW HOUSE 5 now has a great new cover and is available in digital form — as well as print — from all the usual places (Amazon, Barnes & Noble, etc.).

“…but I’m not a writer.”

Andy’s goal was never fame or fortune. He didn’t want an agent. His book was not meant to be a work of literary genius, or the first in a long career.

Don’t get me wrong, he’s a very creative and talented guy. (Especially on guitar. And Draw Something.) But business and baseball are what he loves, not books.

Andy is more than content to leave the publishing scene to me. To which I say, “Thanks! I think…”

Back in 2007, when Andy and I went on our very first trip together, my mom said it would be a good test for us. That you learn a lot about your compatibility with someone when you travel with them.

Five years later, at a chic Italian bistro in the North Beach neighborhood of San Francisco, Andy says out of nowhere, “I think my favorite thing in the world is traveling with you.”

 Classic San Fran icons.

I’m obsessed with jellies.

Typical SF houses in the Mission District. (I felt like I was in Lola and the Boy Next Door!)

Andy realizing that 300-400 ft. trees are really, really tall.

I could not stop thinking about the boats commercial from HIMYM…

The main event of our trip to Charleston was my cousin’s wedding. It was held at a small plantation home on the river, with broad, sweeping trees and a great view of the marshes. We ate the best catered food I’ve ever had. The mosquitoes ate us.

Sometimes it feels like Andy and I have been to a million weddings and should, as a different cousin once said, be “married by proxy.” Sometimes it feels like we are.

Of course there’s no way to know exactly what the future holds. We can only hope and dream and talk and plan. And when things change, we adapt. Together. That’s how we’ve gotten through 6+ years. It isn’t magic.

Or maybe it is.

If you couldn’t tell from the last couple posts, my friend and I took a bajillion pictures in Nashville. Even pictures of taking pictures! How very meta of us.

I have to admit, it got a bit tedious to stop and pose and smile every five minutes. But I’m so glad my friend made me, because now I have a wonderful record of all the things we did and saw. And for someone with a lazy lousy memory, that really comes in handy!

I’m also glad I wasn’t the only one carrying a camera (as I often am). My friend managed to capture several great shots of me and Andy, something I always wish we had more of. In fact, I’ve told him before, even though we don’t want a “real wedding” (in the hundreds-of-guests, big-poofy-white-dress sense) I most definitely do want engagement and wedding photos. Fancy ones.

These will do for now though.

On Thursday night, Andy and I drove to Nashville to visit one of my best friends. For three days we enjoyed good food, live music, and great company. As much as I love writing, and am looking forward to finishing my manuscript, it’s always hard to come back down to earth after a fun, carefree weekend like that.

What helps, though, is how inspired I was by the trip. Big softie that I am, I actually cried a bit at the Grand Ole Opry. They showed clips of Blake Shelton and Carrie Underwood being invited to join the Opry family. They led us through the artist’s entrance, over to the dressing rooms, and then onto the stage. Standing on the infamous center circle, looking out into the auditorium, I imagined what it might be like as a young country singer. To see a full house. To hear the thundering applause. To feel all that history paired up with all those years performing for free in smoky bars, sending out demos to record labels, eating nothing but ramen, writing song after song at three in the morning. And then, if you’re lucky, to be singing at the Opry. A dream come true.

Later that night we went to the Bluebird Cafe. It was like going back in time, to those smoky bars I was talking about. (Except there was no smoke, and I think these guys get paid.) Four songwriters, plus an amazing accompanist, played “in the round” — an unmarked circle in the center of the cafe. We sat close around them, practically elbow to elbow, while they took turns sharing their songs and their stories. Again I was struck by the passion, the heart, in their music and their words. It reminded me of my own journey, my own heart.

From L to R: Shannon Cain, Bill Maier, Robert K. Wolf, and the accompanist, who I think is named Jack Otts. Unpictured is the fourth singer/songwriter, Michelle Hemmer.

They sang of love and laughter, of heartbreak and regret. They sang from a place of honesty. The clarity of their vocals, the purity of their guitars… Genuine emotion poured out of both the musicians and the audience, like so much magic.

That’s what I want to do with my writing. I want to stand on the Opry stage, and I want to sing at the Bluebird Cafe. I want to achieve my dream without forgetting where the passion started. I want to bring readers in the round with me.