Though it breaks Claudia’s heart, she knows she needs a change. In order to work more productively, she must leave her adorable puppy Max. Their afternoon naps together are lovely, but those are valuable hours she could be spending on her writing. So with a great big reluctant sigh, she packs up her laptop and her journal and heads out in search of a new writing hangout.
But when she picks up her keys, Max starts to whimper, knowing she is about to leave him.
“Aw, baby, I’m sorry. I’ll be back soon,” she promises, petting him on the head.
He cries louder, and Claudia feels like Cruella De Vil. She places his favorite stuffed bear in the crate with him. “Better?”
To answer her question, he grumbles and whines. Claudia begins to wonder if leaving is such a good idea. Clearly her puppy will be devastated. But just when she’s about to give in and stay, she notices where his adorable puppy eyes have focused: his treats.
After she places a few shark liver biscuits around his crate, she jingles her keys again. No response. Max is fixated on the treats, his whole body shivering with anticipation. “Now I know how you really feel,” Claudia says, feeling like chopped liver. No wait, she thinks. He’d love me more if I were chopped liver.
“Okay, take them,” she says, giving her official permission. By the time she locks the door behind her, Max has already gobbled up half his prize. And he doesn’t even notice she’s gone.
*
Much as MJ and Felix try to pretend otherwise, things are straight-up awkward. At the lab they are mature enough to keep working together, to act and speak professionally, even to look each other in the eye when necessary. But if, for example, they simultaneously reach for a beaker, they both freeze, and one of them will smile tightly and say, “Go ahead,” so that the other can reach forward without the risk of their hands accidentally touching.
It becomes a dance, the way they move in harmony to avoid one another. They carry out their experiments as partners, sharing space and materials and results, but nothing more. At the end of the day, Felix goes to the pub with the older grad students, and MJ returns to her dorm to finish other assignments in the company of her girlfriends.
Soon MJ begins to resent their uncomfortable situation. She hates tiptoeing around campus. She feels guilty for not reciprocating the feelings Felix obviously has for her. Then she feels angry about feeling guilty because she’s done nothing wrong! Most of all she can’t believe she’s spending so much time thinking about Felix when she has sworn off boys.
Why did Felix have to go and muck this up? she fumes. Why did he have to make me feel like such a schmuck? I was perfectly happy being friends. Why is it so hard — impossible! — for guys to stay platonic with girls? Ugh, they’re so disgusting.
Frustrated and antsy, she stalks over to her window and shoves it open. Cool damp air rushes in, and she closes her eyes, inhaling greedily. She holds the air in her chest, letting it fill her. She wants the air to take up all the space in her mind and body, so there’s no room for anything else. For a few precious moments, it works.
Finally, when she can no longer keep it all in, MJ lets out a slow wistful breath.
Plus we used to have so much fun…
*
At first, Sophie tries MJ’s plan: Avoid Boys. She doesn’t reply to X’s email, she doesn’t answer Diego’s calls, and she definitely doesn’t make plans to hang out with Reggie, who would surely tease her about being in such a tormented love triangle. But 7 persistent emails, 12 rambling voicemails, and 38 frantic text messages later, she realizes avoidance is not going to work.
Okay, I can’t ignore the boys, but maybe I can ignore the problem!
From then on, anytime she chats with X, she makes sure to occupy their conversation by elaborating on every facet of her job search. And whenever Diego comes over for dinner, she bombards him with questions, probing for every detail of Arden Advertising gossip. And if she hangs out with Reggie, she just makes sure to keep a lot of snacks handy. The boy would much rather eat than talk.
After a week of these tactics, Sophie is exhausted. But successful.
Then Reggie drops by her apartment without warning. Panicked, Sophie goes straight to the fridge. “I wasn’t expecting you, so I don’t have much… Want me to cook up some fried rice?”
He shakes his head. “I ate three Chipotle burritos right before I came over.”
“Three? Are you crazy? Those things are huge!”
“Precisely. And I needed to be full to the brim to avoid all your tasty bribes. Oh yes,” he says when he sees the guilty look in her eyes. “I know your tricks. I see right through your games. You’ve been stuffing me to keep me quiet!”
Sophie looks away. “I don’t know what you’re talking about.”
“Uh huh.” Reggie snorts. “Look, Diego told me what’s up. I know X is making you choose.”
“He’s not making me choose. He’s just sort of hoping I will.”
“To-may-to, to-mah-to, po-tay-to, po-tah-to.”
“Mashed potatoes? I can make a batch!”
“Sophie!” Reggie shakes his head. “I know you’re trying to spare them by avoiding the decision, but the truth is, you’re hurting them both instead.”
“So what, I’m the bad guy?” Sophie asks, pouting.
“No,” Reggie says. He walks to her side and puts his arm around her shoulders. “Of course not. You’re a nice girl who’s stuck between a rock and a hard place. But what I’m trying to tell you is, you’re always going to be stuck if you don’t push yourself out. Problems don’t go away on their own. You have to solve them.”
“But I don’t know which of the two solutions is right.”
Reggie smiles. With all the patience and wisdom — and smugness — of a big brother, he says, “What makes you think there are only two solutions?”
