I’m in trouble. And an idiot.
On his business trip to Ireland last month, Andy bought me a beautiful but simple necklace, the first piece of jewelry he’s ever given me, as well as a lovely shepherd’s hook bookmark with a tiny (I’m talking TINY) four-leaf clover in the charm. I instantly loved both.
But this was not the first time that I’d had a shepherd’s hook bookmark. Once long ago, I found one that featured a gorgeous jeweled rose at the end of the hook, which hung over the spine of a book like a flower on a vine. I bought three of the same kind, one for me and each of my two best friends, Alex and Amanda. I felt like this created a special bond between the three of us — even though the two of them never really played together unless it was at my birthday party.
Well, I took said Precious Bookmark of Sisterhood to school one day. As I was waiting for my notoriously late mom to pick me up after class, I decided to read to pass the time. I opened my book, delicately removed the bookmark, and gently laid it on the stone bench beside me. Anyone who has seen me read — on planes, in class, in the middle of a bar while people are heckling a football team on screen — knows that I can completely disappear into a book. Heck, I’m oblivious even when I’m not reading! Needless to say, that was the last I ever saw of that bookmark.
I cried the whole night. My mom told me to stop being stupid, it was just a $7 bookmark after all. (Although, seriously? She let me spend $21 on bookmarks?!) But I insisted that I had broken the eternal bond of friendship between me and Alex and Amanda, and my life was ruined.
Note: Alex and I are still close as ever, and Amanda and I are meeting up when I go home for the holidays in a couple weeks. Yes, clearly I broke the eternal bond of friendship by losing the bookmark.
Fast forward back to today. Or rather, Sunday. When I was reading in the middle of a bar while people were heckling a football team on the screen in front of me. (Oh, you thought I was kidding?) Well, that was the last I saw of the bookmark Andy brought me from Ireland.
The next day I called the bar no less than five times, to no avail. I figured they probably weren’t going to check the parking lot, so today I decided to drive down myself and search. I wanted Andy to know how important this was to me, that I valued his gifts, that I wasn’t a careless idiot!
About five minutes into the drive I realized Andy would probably prefer that I not endanger myself and our dog by speeding through the pouring rain. Oops.
But I was too stupid stubborn desperate to give up and turn around. So while Riley whined in the back seat — have I mentioned he doesn’t like car rides? — I plowed ahead. Again to no avail. After an hour of driving, ten minutes of bugging the bar employees, and fifteen minutes of searching the parking lot in the rain, still no bookmark.
Edit: Also, do you know how moronic you feel telling people you’re desperately searching for a bookmark?? Not a wallet, or a ring, or kid, but a bookmark.
Moral of the story? I suck. And should never get a shepherd’s hook bookmark again. Or least never use it outside the safety of my home.
Got any stories of your own idiocy to cheer me up?