Dear Riley,

St X with Riley 008

Yesterday you ate poop.

Then when I was brushing your teeth, you ate half the toothbrush head.

The only thing that I was happy you ate last night was the hydrogen peroxide I used to induce your vomiting. Until I had to pick up all your vomit. Then I wasn’t feeling so cheerful. (But I did find the piece of the toothbrush amidst the soggy, bile-covered kibbles, so mission accomplished!)

Oh, don’t give me those cute puppy eyes or that big doggy grin. They won’t work on me anymore.

Okay, fine, they will. I still love you. But please, let’s not repeat last night, OK?

Love,
Momma

12 responses to “Grossy gross gross”